I knew I was overwhelmed, but asking for help was not for me. Until it was exactly what I needed. It is okay to ask for help and finding a counselor you feel comfortable with is easy too.
Disclosure: I am partnering with BetterHelp. All opinions are my own.
Anxiety, Depression and Me
Ten years have flown by, but in those 10 years we have been through a TREMENDOUS amount of loss. From my mother-in-law to grandparents, and even babies and our sweet Mia girl. In addition to that, we have also been blessed beyond measure, so please know that I see and acknowledge that. However, knowing all of that, doesn’t make any thing easier and much of that has lead to my depression and anxiety.
I honestly didn’t even realize how much it was affecting me and my everyday life until about 6 months ago. I had known that I was feeling what I thought was extra stress and that I was very nervous constantly. My sleep was rough and I was not eating very well. I had chalked everything up to just dealing with life, with being busy, with being a mom, with being a wife and being everything to everyone.
It wasn’t until my husband looked at me one day, after one of my badgering moments (you know, when you just start questioning everything and are all over the place with your thoughts), and he said, “honey, I think you really need to talk to someone”. With our history and mental health issues he has dealt with, I knew immediately to make an appointment with a counselor. I meet regularly and have come a long way in dealing with my anxiety, stress and depression.
Honestly, I didn’t even realize that I was depressed and on the scale they use to evaluate how depressed you are, I score relatively low, but it is still there. I am dealing with a lot. A lot that I do not discuss because I am just not there yet. Someday I will, someday I know that I will share what has been going on in my head, but for now I am working with my counselor to organize my feelings and get out of this funk.
It is OK to Ask for Help
I think prior to a few years ago, I would not have even thought of asking for help. I am a really independent person. I mean I like having my family around and I depend on my husband, but I tend to just take care of business and assume that it will all work out. I was burying a lot of hurt feelings, worries, anger and frustrations into a body and mind that is already really overworked and that was not healthy.
The hardest part of everything for me was asking for help. Had my husband not said anything, I would likely be in a worse place then I was before I started therapy. The first conversation with my counselor addressed this. I told him that I was not one that felt like I needed therapy, that I was there because I was told to do it and because someone else noticed that I just wasn’t quite myself. He assured me that nearly everyone comes in feeling that they are getting by okay, but that most need a place to process life.
He said that life is hard, life is stressful and that we need to learn ways to cope with our own traumas, triumphs and stressors. He said the first step is always asking for help and that if I was willing to just talk, he would listen without judgement and offer ways for me to manage my own stress. He was right and in the last several months, I have made HUGE gains in the way that I cope with stressful situations, my anxieties and honestly, my depression is at an all time low. It was okay to ask for help and I will continue to do so.
I know someone will read this post, they will feel every word that I have said and they will realize that they too need to ask for help. They may not want to go in person, they may be busy, they may not have the means to get to a in-house facility or getting an appointment with their local place may be weeks out and they need help now. Do NOT give up, online counseling is available through BetterHelp and is an incredible resource.
Signing up is easy and only takes a few minutes to complete a questionnaire and be matched with a counselor. The price is right too, at just $65.00 per week (one session a week can run between $150-$200, so this is a great deal) and there is NO LIMIT to how many times a week you can communicate with your counselor. There are over 3000 counselors available to work with you on BetterHelp and they can chat with you via phone, video or live chat sessions. It is so easy to get the help you need, and honestly worth every penny to get your mental health in a better place. I can tell you that my family is VERY thankful that I have made the choice to do counseling and that I am a much better, wife, mother and even teacher because of it.