Is hard. People tell you that and you think, “how can it be much different then dating, it’s just a piece of paper.” Maybe to some it is a piece of paper. Maybe the sanctity of it is not necessarily there for them. Maybe it’s just not as big of a deal. But in my life, in my marriage it has never just been easy. Jason and I have been ran through the ringer and had our marriage and commitment to each other tested more than most couples we know. I have no clue sometimes how we survive it. I feel like neither of us would want to just give up. We fight hard and love harder. We’re passionate and hard-headed. We have the same goals and at the same time can be complete opposites. We bicker about every little thing…probably because we both like to be heard.
But man those tests, those moments where for a second we catch a glimpse of how hard marriage really is. When we look at each other with more frustration then love. Those moments suck. Most often they are over insignificant things…like lack of sleep. Yes the biggest issue in our house is centered in sleeplessness. Not money, not infidelity, not child-rearing, but stupid sleep.
I have never been one to function on little sleep. All nighters are not my forte’. Jason is pretty much the same way…except he is a terrible sleeper and works crazy hours. I’m sure our babies inherit his awful sleeping skills. Truth be told, the man probably gets more sleep/rest hour wise but I probably get more restful sleep, quality wise.
Who would think that lack of restful sleep would lead to a bickerfest where the word “separation” would tumble out into the open. Now of course we are not separating. We have been tested far beyond sleepless nights and would not give up that easy. Jason and I love each other madly. He is my best friend, I have to die first because living without him would kill me anyway. But obviously something needs to change. So tell me people, how can we chill on the sleep front? We’re tired over here…