Yesterday after a particularly rough day with my children where I was embarrassed, frustrated and thoroughly tired those exact thoughts came to my head. They are so truthful. I literally have no real idea what I am doing as a parent most days, I just make it up.
I am thankful that I had a couple level headed ladies with me yesterday because after my 5 year old forgot that he needs to listen because new friends were around or, dumping the entire contents of my off balanced stroller not once, but twice or an over tired 2 year old absolutely losing her mind, or all the whining, entitled attitudes and lack of general manners, I almost lost it. I believe my exact words were “I am done with this $#!%”.
You see I have SO many people tell me that I look like a mom that has it all together, that my social life appears that my kids are well-behaved, that I am a perfect mom. Well let’s just clear some stuff up. I don’t, they are not and I am far from.
Most of the time my house looks like this:
- Don’t be afraid to be who you are: You are the best example for your kids and if you pretend constantly to be a different person in public than you are in person you are setting a terrible example for your kids. So if you lose your mind sometimes, swat a butt or two, drop an F bomb, feed your kids crap and loath cleaning, embrace it.
- One day at a time: Kids do not understand the sense of time, so why should we worry about tomorrow or the future. (Ok for obvious reasons we should), but realistically, the freak out I had yesterday, the 2 iPad hours my son had after and the crappy dinner we ate because I felt guilty will not be remembered today or probably much. Kids remember good things and forgive pretty easily. If you fail, apologize, if you succeed celebrate if you survived, drink. It is just one day in a string of thousands, you didn’t ruin them for life…yet.
- Let them be: Clearly leaving them to their own demise is not the best idea, but I have found that my kids need their quiet time too. So when I take my “self-preservation time” they get some too. If that is time on an iPad, in front of a TV or playing with toys, it is ok. We all get tired of each other.