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Hysterectomy Day!

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Warning:  I am going on a rant about the hysterectomy, which is all in good humor, but I decided to include some photos that although they are drawn images, some folks might not like.

Today in about 2 hours I will be at the hospital prepping for my hysterectomy.  I should be showering and packing bags for my kids in case they need to stay overnight and running to get dog food because of course we are out and I wont be able to lift that 50 lb bag of food when I hopefully get home tonight and this puppy would never forgive me. Who could blame her.

Obviously none of that is happening.  My house is clean, the laundry is done, the kids are sleeping in by some miracle, and surprisingly I am not starving and ready to kill someone for food.  Likely after I am done writing this post I will take care of some emails and social media stuff and then I will go get my shower on.  It will look something like this.  Basically I have to pre-scrub and sanitize before they likely cover my entire body in a huge sheet of iodine and stab holes in me.  Too much 😜?

Did you know that my instructions say to specifically wash my belly button really well with this stuff.  
I am pretty worried about my belly button, I like it and am pretty attached to it…unlike that horrible uterus.

I am not very nervous.  I have never gone under general anesthesia before so that is a bit worrisome, but I also do not care to be awake while they take some robots and stab them into my body to tear out my mean ol’ uterus.

I was worried about the pain and still am slightly, but many people have told me that the laparoscopic pain is not that awful.  I do have to remember that I have had 2 kids cut out of me and a had to take care of them while taking care of myself.  However, I hear that the gas pain is pretty dang awful, so that sounds fun.  Can’t wait to be inflated like a balloon with CO2 and then have that gas try to escape but not really have an easy exit if you know what I mean.  Likely, I wont be pleasant to be around, but I also wont have a uterus that hates me either or a period ever again.

Yeah…no, I am not nervous.  I am so darn excited (aside from the gas pains, there is no excitement there).  I am ready to not chance becoming anemic again, to not be making so much blood and losing it all so quickly for such long periods of time.  I am ready to not have to plan my outfits around my hateful uterus.  I am ready to stop purchasing stock in feminine products.  I don’t care if I cant eat until tonight, or that I will have some stab wounds and gas pains.  After this afternoon, I get my life back and you know what, that is pretty damn awesome!

Adios you terrible, horrible, mean uterus.  You did your job and got my babies here, but were done, this isn’t working out anymore and it is time for both of us to move on.

WOOHOOO!

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Kimberley

Tuesday 4th of August 2020

Thank the heavens for your post. The question I have is did your belly shrink after the swelling went down? Also did you feel good moving around after the first week? Sincerely Scared 😨

Laura

Wednesday 5th of August 2020

Hi! You are so very welcome. Do NOT be scared. It is the best possible thing I have had done and I feel 100% better than I have in years. My belly did shrink after a few months. You can use a belly binder to help control the swelling and lay off salty foods as well as taking arnica tablets and bromelain as they also naturally help with swelling (I am not a doctor, these are my own experiences, talk with doc to double check). I actually went to a funeral for my uncle the day after surgery and although I was in pain and exhausted I was able to move around. I would for sure take it easy and make sure that I rest as much as possible, but moving is important. We went to Disneyland by week 3 if that gives you a sense of how quick healing went. Also schedule a massage (at least a chair one) within a couple days of surgery because the gas they pump into your body cavity moves into your neck and shoulders and was the WORST part of healing. The massage and moving around actually helped IMMENSELY. Good luck! Its the best thing ever!

kelsey

Saturday 4th of July 2020

Thank you so much for sharing this!

Laura

Monday 6th of July 2020

yay! You are welcome!

Sheretta

Sunday 8th of September 2019

I stumbled acrossed your blog today. Thank you for sharing your story. I did a lot of research myself and was able to gather most of the things you suggested. My surgery was 13 days ago. My uterus was removed through my lower abdomen. I seem to be healing wonderfully. One take away I did not have were the leggings. I will be looking into those today. Thank for sharing. Sheretta

Laura

Sunday 8th of September 2019

Yay! Having the comfort around my incisions was SO important

Brandy

Wednesday 28th of August 2019

I stumbled across your blog and, if you’re open to it, I would love to privately chat more about hysterectomy stuff. I’m facing the possibility of one and I’m sort of freaking out....just a little, lol!! Anyway, if you are please email me but if not I totally understand! I’m so glad it went so well for you!

Laura

Tuesday 3rd of September 2019

Thanks! Sent an email, glad we had a moment to chat!

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